I Spent several hours at the mall having my brakes evaluated and repaired, which lead to a lot of time painting figures in a Games Workshop store. This is a hobby that I have enjoyed for many a year now I like to be creative and any activity that allows me to listen to music is a plus. I rapped with the lads that work there currently Tom had a story about a woman who was locked out of Sears because they like to close their gates prompty at 9:30 normaly this is just a nusance and the people get to walk the long way out side but they happend to have her car. So Tom basically breaks into Sears and demands to see a manager! The first person he runs into tell him to leave and he then demands to see a manager, the manager was not helpfull at all but Tom insisted and after he had to figure out himself how to open the garage door the woman got to pay and leave in her own car that night.
In the middle of this I managed to eat at The JB Mac a new favorite and i noshed on some nummy comfort food. Also I ran into my buddy Ahren who shared a laugh with me and yet again attempted to bully me into gettign a phone. I may even get one in the near future.
Then I get to Talk to Travis about the fact he isn't happy in his relationship, Hmm I'm less than sucessful with women, like I seldom make it past second dates and I am far from having honest advice about the second year. He was a seemed a little upset I had nothing serious to say.
Then I get home and turn On World Of Warcraft aww my fake world who could find me here, Then i get to talk to Drew about his career delema's Hes accepted a job that was good but he has a chance to work with a larger company with better hours and free relocation Oh did i mention more money. Even though He did sign agreement papers I told him all her would really piss off is the HR people and who really cares about them.
Then Much WOW was played and a drink was had I've been making my own Appletini's and thats a good thing, sadly I'm all out and now have a tiny bit of left over vodka I may just save it and move onto the next mixed beverage and I'll have a few ounces of vodka for a rainy day.
AS for me and women I have a few crushes and while I'm really into one person in particular I have nothing to count on that would say this relationship is guaranted. Were not hanging out on a regular basis out side of work were certanly not in a kissing phase yet. While it may be foolish to be hopefull ( as I am often foolish) I have a few other crushes but those are very far fetched and I've even had coworkers address to me about my bouts of depression and or socialy crippling low self esteem (line up ladies Nick Is a winner) but the last lovely i dated has forgiven me enough to invite me to go with her to a Jack and Jill this week this should be fun and I always like to meet new people.
Also everyone for the most part has that one person they have unfinished business one some old lover or someone that there was allways sexual tention with, or even some that the two of you just never connected in any way other than as soulmates and that was not enough for one of you.
Maybee you told them you loved them, maybe you said love without you is like a wave with out the white cap, in my case we met online and i told her i loved her and was willing to move very far away to be with her. I was only half right I was not willing to move and after we spoke late Monday night we both appologised possibly for the last time about this and we caught up a little. I'd really like to visit her and have her visit me I'd imagine our chemistry would be differant but I'd love to spend quality time with some one who knew me when I was 21 and have them get to know the person i am know. I really would like to hear what she has to say about me and possibly I want her to aprove of me as a decent human being. Because sometimes I question that fact, and well i never know how to answer myself.
Also today I found out an old old friend of mine came out of the closet finaly to her mother, in a situation where the whole world may have known but her mother. I'm sorry but I think people should love each other and I think people should have sex. I don't like to hear other wise. If your missing one or the other your missing a wonderfull part of life. And if you fine someone thats a boy like you or a girl like you and thats the way you feel awsome, thats your moment of time to enjoy as best you can. If its always going to be that way then bravo you may know a little bit more about yourself and thats a step to enlightenment. Yes I know the Canonised overly translated into archaic English that we don't understand bible tell us homosexuality is wrong, I get that in fact I also understand it tell us to do many thing we do all the time. See with faith we can pick and choose what we want and we allways do, I've known many people to stand behind the bible in third person hearsay but they never truly study it, not in a way that really explores the stories that are shared in its pages. Like Samson and Deliah is not about love of the wrong woman its about faith, see Nazarites didn't cut their hair as a matter of tradition having his hair cut and his heritage insulted is enough to destroy any man of faith. But they never tell you that stuff cause well they don't study anything they just think they know. and ALl this crap about hell having lots of levels and the devil living there now, (made up) celestial choir (made up) saints (made up) and we let these people tell us what is right pssh. I used to work with a woman years ago that told me I was a sinner because I endulged in premarital sex, while she was on her third marrage with her 4th child on the way and she was planning to leave her husband all at the age of get this 22. I'm the one who is moraly corrupt?
I belive these people are no differant than you and me and i wish my brothers and sisters the best in life. No matter who you are what you are doing, just go love some one and please don't let old ideas tell you you can't love that person especialy if that person is your family and dare i say it that petty Being mad at your daughter for kissing girls and being upset you'll never walk her down the aisle is like being upset your son dosn't play football. Their life not yours their decisions not yours. Life is hard enough with all these things we have to worry about with car repairs, career decision, your romantic life, typical adult regret, for some people children to have to need the concent of your loved ones for a life choice that may have been decided for you by nature.
Games have rules because some one wrote them, I wonder if physics and chemistry are the rules of the game we play and who wrote them.~Nicholas Israel Martinez.
PS. I went to my friends blog and left this in their comment.
I feel that if you have trust, honor, and respect you can't be wrong.